Computer Jokes
They say that the new super computer knows everything. A skeptical man came and asked the computer, "Where is my father?"
The computer bleeped for a short while, and then came back with "Your father is fishing in Michigan."
The skeptical man said triumphantly, "You see? I knew this was nonsense. My father has been dead for twenty years."
"No", replied the super computer immediately. "Your mother's husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout."
Answer: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
Question: What do computers eat when they get hungry?
Answer: Chips.
Question: How is the new iMac like a woman?
Answer: Neither one will take a 3 1/2 inch floppy and they both like a big hard drive.
Question: How do you keep a programmer in the shower all day?
Answer: Give him a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."
Question: Why all Pascal programmers ask to live in Atlantis?
Answer: Because it is below C level.
Question: What's the difference between Windows 95 and a virus?
Answer: A virus does something.
Question: Why is sex like software?
Answer: For everyone who pays for it, there are hundreds getting it for fre
